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01 October 2010

Comments

TheRevKev

WE

MUST

BE

THEIR

HOPE!

It's time for us to get past all of the "IT AIN'T NOBODY'S BUSINESS WHAT I DO" closetedness in the Black Gay male community and do MORE AND MORE to stand out and stand up so that these young men SEE THEMSELVES in the future, AS A FUTURE, and have somewhere safe to be!!!

NON-PREDATORY MENTORING means that we have to stop looking at the "young hot boys" as possible lovers and SEE THEM AS SONS! We've got to put our hands on our kids again and LIFT THEM UP because society is only trying to beat them down.

We've got to create SOMETHING SAFE for these young people to be able to use as a resource that helps them out of these dark holes that they can fall in so quickly and so quietly!

I am so tired: IT'S TIME FOR US TO GET OFF OF OUR ASSES AND DO SOMETHING! (Matthew 21:5-7). It's scripture. It's our work! WE MUST GET OFF OF OUR SLOW MOVING VEHICLE AND TAKE BACK OUR COMMUNITY!!!

I was at Rutgers all day yesterday and our youth are in pain! They feel alone and all of this technology makes them feel MORE ALONE QUICKER and MORE HATED, LOUDER!

WE HAVE GOT TO HELP!

WE

MUST

BE

THEIR

HELP!


WE

MUST

BE

THEIR

HOPE!!!!

Brien

I am having a visceral reaction to this bit of tragic news. too many, too quickly. something has got to be done.

Diva1961

I agree RevKev. And thank you for speaking to our group recently. The climate for lgbt youth has got to change. we really do have to stand up and mentor these young people in a healthy, loving way. Ore and more are thinking of suicide as the only alternative.

What happens when our future generation of lgbt's kill themselves off, when we know we could have made a difference?

Ed O'Brien Sr

Sad so sad that the young kids in our society feel they have no where to turn. This judging of others because of their race, religion, sexual orientation, ethnicity must sieze. We have become a society of judges. Who gave that right, no one. We have to really stop this discrimination of each other now. We are doing exactly what they want us to do, and that is hate each other so they can control us. We have to start now to helping and communication no matter who we are, where we come from, and any "differences" we have. Totally unacceptale. God Bless those kids and their families and friends.

...

Ray was a truly respectable person, along with his jokes and cool dances that everyone loved. There is not 1 memory where i dont smile. truthfully i believe it was something other than him being gay b/c everyone knew and accepted it, but according to the media they "assume" its bullying just b/c he was gay NO ONE EVER made fun of ray b/c everyone liked him. He was the cool guy in school that everyone wanted to be around in order to have fun. he will be loved and missed FOREVER R.I.P. RAY

Former COGIC

'we have to stop looking at the "young hot boys" as possible lovers and SEE THEM AS SONS!'

Thank you so Rev Kev. I have to admit, that's just common sense and the right thing to say or do. Unfortunately, our black and black gay communities are so dysfunctional, doing the right thing is often the pass least taken.

What I noticed this week was that so many of our brothas were quick to cut down the young men accusing Eddie Long, or say they were just 'turned out.' I've also that none of those same people have any comments on these teen suicides. Just because something happened to them, or they're doing something to young boys, does not mean that its right.

We have to try to uplift our youth and mentor. We have to open our hearts and our souls.

Rest in peace,the gentle soul of Raymond Chase. May you find the peace in the after life that eluded you on earth.

Chitown Kev

As I wrote at Pam's a few minutes ago, it's the Werther effect that concerns me now.

I mean, with both the Clementi and now Chase's suicides, there's too much of a feeding frenzy by the gay blogs (I addressed this once before here in the aftermath of the Hoover-Walker and Herrera deaths).

And we don't even know if this was an death due to anti-gay bullying or a bad breakup with a boyfriend...

Maybe the way I numb out all of the pain from reading these time and time again (since I've been there as far as the suicidal thoughts as a LGBT teen) is to shut my emotions off and go all Dr. Spock and sh*t...

I don't know...

Chitown Kev

Just to clarify, because I don't mean to sound cold.

Particualarly this death but also the Clementi deaths have come about at a time of several news reports of suicides due to anti-gay bullying (with other reports of anti-gay bullying too that didn't result in suicide).

And that hot mess with Miss 50 Cent.

Trust, I know that our LGBT youth (particularly if they're black) are vulnerable to suicide but I don't necessarily read either this and, to a large degree, the Clementi death as a result of direct anti-LGBT bias.

I meant to say that I have no more idea why Chase decided that suicide was the only option than anyone else but this death taking place in this mediia environment at this time...is a bit much.


Flame away at me if you must, maybe my thoughts right now aren't clear enough but...whatever.

Duane Johnson

Our LGBT youth, (and us, for that matter) are victimized because we're seen we weak, and not able to mount a response. Only when we're a community that is feared financially, politically, and physically, will this stop. Teaching our youth to be the alpha males of their peers is a first step.

DFS

Good comments as usual Rev.

Also not to minimize the particular concern of suicide among young gay men, but suicide among young black men in general has increased since the 80s (the Denver Broncos player being a recent high profile example). Like homosexuality, mental illness and depression are still subjects not easily broached in our community and brother either dont have access or are ashamed to seek help. Sad situation all around

Distant Lover

@The RevKev, Thank you for your words! I am committed to being a mentor to LGBT teens.

Johny

sadly, im done caring.

it wasnt any easy for me but i fought it and those who bullied me.

so rather then killing themselves, either these kids should fight back or kill their attackers and tormentors.

scare the hell out of the straight kids. gay kids need to be dangerous.

enough is enough

MW09

@TheRevKev

You're always full of win! You're a true inspiration and joy.

May this young man rest in peace. I hope more young men in the future will choose to overcome their pain than let it consume them. SUICIDE SHOULD N-E-V-E-R BE AN OPTION!!

Kevin Perez

A poster by the name of Mitch Wright, most likely straight and religious, posted in the Clementi topic that issues like these should blamed on mental problems we that we might have, that he's tired of us addressing these issues as "bullying" because he was able to get through life easy, so we should follow his example and his bible-thumping mother's advice

Chet

What is this community coming to? This is so very sad, we are losing our young brothas at an alarming rate. I can't help but get teary eyed just thinking about these brothas and their unexplained pain.

JBK!

Beautifully said @RevKev.
I'm inspired to mentor as well.

BLACK VINGENCE

SO SO SAD WE HAVE 2 LIFT THE YOUTH UP SHOW THEM THE WAY LIKE WE WERE TAUGHT EVEN IF WE WASNT TAUGHT ATLEAST WE KNO THE INS AND OUTS NOW SO LET'S SHOW THE YOUTH THAT IT'S OK 2 BE THEMSELVES OPENLY AND WILLINGLY EACH ONE TEACH ONE,YOU ARE YOUR BROTHERS KEEPA

Jewels

I agree, as black gay men we sit on our asses and we react to NOTHING. Strength comes in numbers and these kids feel like they have no future. WE ARE THEIR FUTURE and we must all remember when we were in school and how awful it felt to feel alone and powerless over something that you could not control. We should be ALL OVER the media right now attacking Ms. Eddie Long and her line of wigs for her hypocrite statements and rallies. I just don't get US!

Dfash

Ray may not have been "bullied" by his friends and those around him while he was in high school, but few know what he went through outside of those confines. I am guessing that he was out while in college and for that I feel some peace when I think of him. Even if he was out (I never heard him speak about being gay and I sat with him for 2 lunch periods for his entire senior year) it was very limited. Those that knew him may have taken it for granted, but he was not out. He did not really connect with adults. He was funny, social, bright and wonderful, but did any of us really know him? Did anyone have real discussions about who he was under all that humor? Did he has knowledgeable support? No one has to call you names or physically harm you in order for you to feel outside, different, and alone. It can be done so many other ways such as pretending that LGBTs are not part of society(where are LGBTs in text books?/ don't ask don't tell etc). Duane's post was magnificent. He hits it right when he writes, " Our LGBT youth, (and us, for that matter) are victimized because we're seen we weak, and not able to mount a response. Only when we're a community that is feared financially, politically, and physically, will this stop." We have to change politics as usual. LGBT people need to take a more proactive stance and be involved at all levels in order to become acculturated. As it is now, it is too easy for the dominant society to make the rules for everyone else.

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