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29 July 2010


Nathan James

No one in authority wants to investigate this "icky" case of a closeted man of color who met his demise under "questionable" circumstances. Given that the detective was given four days after the shooting to get his story together, plus the fact there were no witnesses, I seriously doubt we will ever know what really transpired in the park on that fateful night.

What we do know, is that we still haven't reached the day when people like DeFarra Gaymon can be out, proud, and highly successful in any profession they choose. Yes, Gaymon made a choice when he opted to stay in the closet for the sake of his social status and career, but it was a choice at least partially made for him, by the society we live in. I'm not backing off my position on that.

Cocoa Rican

It's disturbing that we can all agree that we may never know what happened that fateful day, but we don't continue to stand behind:
1. Gaymon has never been identified as gay, bisexual, down-low, etc. prior to this allegation and outside of what the officer is alleging, no past homosexual encounters for Gaymon have been identified or have come forward.
2. Why would a decorated, experienced officer on the beat for sex crimes in the park not be prepared for an alleged fleeing suspect or an alleged defensive suspect?
3. Why would the use of deadly force be necessary when the an alleged suspect is only armed with his penis in hand?
4. Why did it take so long to get a complete story from the officer?

I don't know Gaymon or the officer, but I know that there are always two sides to every story and (presently) no one knows definitively why Gaymon was in that park, why he would attack a police officer when he stands to lose so much more than he would gain from the altercation and why the officer used deadly force to control the incident.

We should all take a moment to reflect and suspend judgment until the facts are known; in reality, we should live by the rules and laws that govern our nation and admit that we are all innocent until proven guilty; in Gaymon's case, the disregard for that basic right cost him his life.


Disgraceful. Why is this not being investigated.

Just Saying

I feel sorry for this guys wife and family if there is an Investigation his entire Down Low life will come out and will embarrass his entire family. So I stand behind them there should be no investigation. I don't think the police should have shot him but to save his family more humilation leave it be

Winston Jerome

I'm shocked. This deserves to be investigated. I understand that it could be embarassing to the family; but if the officer used excessive force and wrongly killed someone (despite WHATEVER the circumstance), he should be prosecuted.

I could understand if he used a taser and that contributed to his death. But a decorated, experienced officer used a gun on an unarmed man. The family deserves closure. No matter how much the truth hurts.

During college when I was exploring my sexuality, I used to frequent bookstores and cruise spots. It was very empty living a double life.

I am now 26 years old and decided to finally own my truth and be authentic to my family and friends. My true friends never looked at me different. I don't walk around waiving a rainbow flag (although I admire those that do), but it feels good to be honest and introduce my boyfriend as such and not 'my roommate.'

My best friend reminds me of this banker. Educated, sucessful and on the DL.

Winston Jerome

Gay Black men, the closet is killing us. It is very empty and can lead to depression, risky behavior and death. Own your truth, hold your head high and never look back.

Don't let excuses like 'I won't achieve success' stop you from attaining the inner peace you deserve.

Ok, I'm done preaching. Great coverage, Rod. Everyone have a great weekend.


>>Gay Black men, the closet is killing us. It is very empty and can lead to depression, risky behavior and death. Own your truth, hold your head high and never look back.

Winston, you're absolutely right. Homophobia, stigma and the closet is literally killing our community .... from sky high HIV rates to gay bashers encouraged by preachers ... to closeted men killing to keep their secret or being killed in the process.

I'm not "condemning" anyone but Nathan makes some very good points. And so did COGIC in a previous thread. No matter how what the closet brothas want us to beleive, you cant discuss this incident w/o discussing the closet. We can't just compartmentalize the incident and concentrate on the excessive use of force and pretend the circumstances were normal. They were not.

It's a tragic story and there are many victims here, including Mr. Gaymon. Rest his soul and bless his family.

Black Pegasus


Here you queens go again; Blaming this Man's demise on the DL Culture..

He was gunned down by a zealous Pig Cop, Plain and Simple! His "closet status" has nothing to do with it!

Have yourselves a good weekend! I'm off to the neighborhood park for a jog..

Pray I don't get shot in the back!


@ Black Pegasus:

You really need to stop calling people 'queens' every time you get on this blog. It doesnt insult me but it shows your own internal homophobia. It also illustrates what black gay men have to go through and why many of us are afraid to come out.

And stop playing hall monitor and saying what the topics are. It's Rod's blog and even he does not tell people what not to discuss.

I'm not sure exactly what happened in the park day, but I doubt Mr. Gaymon, god rest his soul, was out for a mere job in his business suit in the park at night. The other day you blamed a 'racist homophobic' cop, now you say something else. Maybe you should sit this one out.

Moving along ... Aint it a blip that the county says iuty can investigate itself? Very obvious the state doesnt want to have anything to do with this case. Too radioactive. RIP Defarra Gaymon. Hopefully there will be cosmic justice for you and peace for your family. And hopefully there can be some closure and some lessons learned for our community. Unfortunately, many of us are in denial and refuse to own our truths. Sadly that is the history of black people in general and black sgl/gay men in particular.

watch the pillars of the earth season 1 episode 3

it need a brief investigations regarding this problem.

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