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12 October 2010



I think we have to start with the churches, synagogues, mosques, etc.

This is why I think organizations such as Soulforce are so important.
I am an atheist but I recognize in order for a lot of people to change their views about LGBT people, you have to reach them via religion. ::sigh::


I wish I had the answers (or knew someone who did). What do you do when young people like Aiyisha Hassan (and the young man who took his life yesterday), are ALREADY INVOLVED in LGBT student groups, and have access to information, mentors, and programs like the IT GETS BETTER PROJECT? And they STILL CHOOSE to END IT ALL? I'm positive these are just the ones we're hearing about - that there are SO MANY OTHER CASES that aren't making the news! Some HEAR the messages that are out there, and some will CHOOSE NOT TO LISTEN!

So, what do you do?


At a Harvard Divinity School forum last Thursday a point was made that we, the GLBT population, must boldy re-shape the conversation and find ways to mentor and support GLBT youth - thus proving prove that not every GLBT adult is out to have sex with youth. We really do have to show them that "It Gets Better" and that you CAN get through it. GLBT youth today have a far more promising future than those of us who came out 20 years ago; but we have to tell our stories of survival and triumph so that they realize it. Let's start talking!!!


Our young people need mentors of all kinds who will allow them to speak their truth and to be patient while some stumbling takes place. But taking their lives is taking something valuable from us all! I don't know if church is the safe haven, there's hotlines and LGBT Community Centers all over. Please reach out if you feel you need someone to talk to. Living is a far braver act! So...Act Up!

Taylor Siluwé

I'm almost speechless. The battle now is to not let this all just make us go numb. We can't let that happen.

The next generation needs us to be vocal and loud about the homo-hatred from on high which is the cause of all this.



Bruh Luva

No one knows what the emotional
state of the next person might be,
so if we all treat one another as
we would like to be treated, maybe
some of the cruelty in this world
can be curtailed. However, we live on Earth, not Xanadu. Odds are that people will continue to be cruel, and even crueler. We SGL people, in the way we can determine what is fashionable, often can also dictate it. I think a bit of that is taking place now. Suicide is being made
"cute". Gays have always been made fun of in some form, why is there such a spate of gay suicides now? Its as if they all are symbolically joining hands and ending their lives. Regardless of what another may say
or preach, you are one of God's
children, and your life has worth and meaning. Learn to love the
person YOU are, because you a-r-e
you. Suicide is never the answer
to any question you should be asking yourself. We all have reserves of inner strength, some
just are better at calling on theirs than others. Love yourself
enough to want the best for yourself.

Honut Sinti

So tragic...

Former COGIC

Corey, good question. The answers are not so clear cut, especially in cases like Aiyisha, who apparently came from a "good family". I wish them all the best and much love during these dark days.


this has to stop all people that hate on homosexual human beings, need to be put away, jail, get their asses beat...etc.. STOP THE HATE


Bruh Luva touched on an important aspect of these depressing and distressing events, is that they're becoming fashionable.

The teenage psyche is undergoing many changes and increased growth nearing adulthood, and I hate feeling like this is having a bandwagon effect in hopes of 15 minutes of notoriety.

Teens see victims names over every blog, and huge candlelight vigils in the deceased honor and possibly think, "wow I feel unloved and unseen and I want thousands to mourn me and celebrities to speak my name, I'll do that too!"

Like others have mentioned, bullies and gays have been around forever, I appreciate great campaigns like It Gets Better, I just want to see that these messages take a tough stance on suicide, and encourages struggling youth to be brave and strong.

I hope it doesn't come off as insensitive, but I think a bit less codifying and exhalation of those who chose to end their lives would help quell the bandwagon factor. Maybe mention the deceased but not by name perhaps,...the are ways to honor an unfortunate event without romanticizing, we need to shift the focus onto survivors, and make them be the lead story and role model.


Note that the story from Hilltop Online, about the candlelight vigil, carefully omits any mention of homosexuality, whether they're talking about Hassan, Tyler Clementi, or any other of the recent GLBT suicides. It's erasure.


I'm unhappy with the disapproving/almost condescending tone some of us are taking towards these young people's suicides. as someone who has struggled with depression for the majority of her adult life and is only just re-experiencing life again, i want to point out that depression is often an expression of extreme helplessness and tremendous anger turned inwards. To dismiss these young people's deaths/suicides as acts of cowardice or weakness is disrespectful to them and to the rest of us. Not all LGBT youth are clinically depressed--but those that are, may need much, much more than just a few meetings at the local LGBT youth group.

Also i'm not saying that those who committed suicide were necessarily clinically depressed--but suicide is such a radical/extreme act that we shouldn't dismiss it as 'merely' an act of weakness/cowardice/capriciousness.
i doubt it was just them 'jumping on the bandwagon' or looking for their 15 minutes of fame. This is precisely the kind of unfeeling, unthinking 'pull yourself out of this with your bootstraps' mentality that drives people over the edge. this insistence on 'toughing it out' kind of echoes heterosexist insistence that you 'man/woman up' and squash any 'homo' tendencies that you might have.

Lets not romanticise it...but lets ask what more could have been done to prevent it. its NOT the fault of the suicides (keeping in mind that there are many different ways to commit suicide while continuing to live--drugs, alcohol. we are less likely to refer to these people as 'cowards' who are 'taking shelter' in chemical highs, even though its a form of living death).

If we wish to play the blame game--which i have my reservations about--we should be looking long and hard at OURSELVES. we the SURVIVORS, those who are here and queer or queer allies, need to think long and hard about how we can change and improve our approach to LGBT youth's sense of disenfranchisement given the wider homophobic culture we live in. We are our brothers' and sisters' keepers.


Any act of suicide is a saddening case for all people. Even more so when suicide is your only recourse to end the ridicule of just being yourself.

I hear everyone saying, "start a campaign! Bring more attention to this issue!" But I disagree. Although most common logic will state that such an epidemic should be be addressed with public advocacy or a campaign to bring heightened awareness but when it comes to suicide it does more harm than good.

History and studies have shown that suicide epidemics begin and continue when a notable suicide is made public. Thousands of people contemplate suicide and most will never act on it. A number of people will commit suicide no matter is said or done to prevent it. But a very select few will act on it when given permission. That permission is made available to them when they receive the news of a highly publicized suicide.

Mind you I am no sociologist and I don't know how to combat this but information is a popular theory that is actively recognized. Maybe someone else can back me up on this. I say start a campaign but do the research to provide a success resolution.

Malik Shakur

We as a people have to step out of the closet!



Honestly, I am at a loss, as most folks are when it comes to this issue. All anyone can do for the most part is recognize the symptoms of intent to suicide and offer support...and most of all...tell the people that are in your life that you love them and they can come to you for a listening ear and arms that will hold them close, even when they feel unlovable.


Service for Aiyisha Asilee Lindiwe Hassan today was spiritual and beautiful, mournful and joyful. Still, the grief has me immobilized. Oh Lord, hear our prayers.


Suicide huge stigma, No one wants their problems put out in the open so the results on occasions become deadly. What am trying to say is, we need to do a better job in speaking up when we see a problem. Most of these cases could have been prevented if some addresses the problem and asked the question, is there something I can do to help. It sounds too simplistic but the truth is we don't ask enough.


what a terrible thing to do with one's life.So young and educated but yet so silly in thinking. OMG

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