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25 October 2010



Though I'm saddened by a loss of another human being, it's really starting to annoy me that suicide has become the "way to go out" for those who are struggling, at which I'm starting to lose sympathy.

We've all had our struggles, some harder than others, but committing suicide for reasons such as only means that you're giving up. Some of us have or have had it much worse and it saddens me to see young people taking the "easy way out", in many cases to prove a point.

I'm not going to judge Joseph or his unknown reason for giving up that hope, but to do so would be allowing any opposition to "win" or makes a person "weak". I do feel sympathy for his family, but I can't say I hold much for him, though it truly saddens me that a person such as himself can just throw it all away. Blessings to him and his family though.


listen jrc i think u are veeery mean and you are an ignoramous. you are a pompus insecure arrogant good for nothing jerk and you should feel really bad for saying that. i feel really strongly about defending lgbtq people. and i will do what ever it takes to get people torealize that and if means telling you off so be it!!!!

Fola Obahnjoko

I knew him and he was/is the sweetest guy you'd ever want to meet. I remember seeing him one day and asking him how he was....he said okay.but if you could look at him at that moment, he didn't seem okay. I told him that if he wants to talk, we are here for him and here is my number. I told hime to call me and i did not hear from him. When i got the news of his unfortunate demise...........i did not see the face until today! LISTEN YOUNG PEOPLE.THERE ARE PEOPLE YOU CAN TALK TO ............ THIS IS UNACCEPTABLE. I THINK THAT WE NEED TO BE HERE FOR ONE ANOTHER WITHIN THE LGBTQ COMMUNITY. THE ELDERS NEED TO REACH OUT TO THE YOUNG FOLKS AND VISE-VERSA!


I wish people would understand the cliche' (paraphrased) Nothing is as it seems...

@Tony I personally don't believe your post, sorry.

Kevin Perez

"Jesus can fill many of those. Find a loving, supportive and affirmative church and get some spiritual uplifting."

More than ever, I strongly believe there is some bizzare feitish that people of color have with citing Jesus or Allah as being the answer your problems. It just goes to show you how people choose to ignore the harsh reality and this unhealty obsession with revisioning religions to give the false notion that they are accepting, tolerant, and understanding. If your answer is more church and that tired "Jesus loves you the way you are", congraulations, you're part of the problem. And what's this BS about sin? Even in liberal, progressive circles we still have people sounding like these annoying preachers boasting about how much we need "Him"

The only creeps/scums on the comments here posted are the ones who babble about this man's death, proudly expressing their disdain or disapproval. I've had suidical thoughts but fortunately, never had the courage to do so. I stil can't understand it but I don't pretend to so like many of you do here. Suicide is the coward's way out? According to religion and we all know how much religion sucks and the mindless drones many Christians and others are. There's nothing admirable or courageous about Tony's self-rightous rant. Gotta love the patronizing statements about sympathy and alleged condolences to Jefferson's parents, I'm sure they would love to hear online strangers giving their dissaproval, self-rightous tirades, calling him a creep and all that, while being told they have "their" sympathy.

Your experince is your experince. Don't be hypocrite and complain about pity parties giving that many of the "brothas and sistas" who aren't LGBT and others are the first ones to celebrate.


@Kevin Perez - So everyone is supposed to either sympathize like you or shush? You do realize that you're condoning the same action you're opposing, right?

I'm sure the family would love to keep to themselves as well, but don't go off on a rant because there are those who do not share similar thoughts, talking about "patronizing" and "giving their disapproval" when you're giving your "disapproval" for those not thinking the same way you do.

Then you talk about those who use religion as a vector of showing compassion as "some bizarre fetish", especially amongst "people of Color"(irony at its best). You do know you're committing the same act that those who are homophobic do against the LGBTQ community, right?

Practice what you preach next time, don't shun those who share a different belief or thinking than you do, at the same time voicing an extremely biased opinion of your own. Don't cite hypocrisy then commit it immediately afterward.

Those who choose to express feelings can do so in their way they choose, even if said sentiments are felt by a majority.

Kevin Perez


I can go off a rant as I please! Spare me your self-rightous BS. Tony and others in this paticular discussion have gone beyond showing a simple disagreement but have, whether you think so or not, ATTACKED Jefferson with their whiny, condecending rants about how he was selfish, that he was a creep, suicide wasn't the answer. And you have the gawk to excuse me of showing disapproval when share the same sentiments at the pathetic attempt to berate a young man's death? Just because some people have it worse and have been able to cope with far worse things their life doesn't give Tony and OTHERS to get on their high horses.

I know this upsets you and other church queens with but those who use religion as a "vector of showing compassion" are USELESS and patronizing. That's what I meant by those comments. Does the truth hurt? You so-called "LIBERAL" Christians do nothing but give lip service and ignore the elephant in the room. You downplay and even trivialize how much religion plays into the scrutiny of LGBT and homophobia and depend on strawman arguments so you won't cope with the fact how harmful religion can be to some of us. Ignore the harsh reality of religion on LGBT and look at it through a Pollyana view. Don't get all high and mighty and tell me that pointing out a obvious fact makes me on the same level of those right-wring fundies/homophobes telling the likes of me and others they're going to hell, that where on abomination or daring to question religion or your bi-popular magical sky god is "bigotry". Communities of color still can't even discuss issues such as sex and human sexuality without Bible-thumping morons giving their 2 cents. The true irony is, communities of color LOVE to claim how conservative, how religious and how biblically correct they are when in reality, they are the most dysfunctional.

Take your own advice, and pratice what you preach. Respect that some of us have our own personal views on religion that shatter your obnoxious, rosy-colored views that "liberal" Christians continue to impose on us. Respect the fact that some of us don't like to be patronized and have religion continued to be shoved down our throats as a solution to coping with the problems that FACE LGBT. Respect the fact some us have every right to be mad at the negative comments of Jefferson's suicide. Respect that some have EVERY RIGHT to be upset at some of the nasty comments here. More importantly, RESPECT that some us believe religion being used as a vector of kidness, is HYPOCRASY and PATRONIZING at its finest.

Many of you self-proclaimed religious folks are the ones who do the most preaching, and can't even follow your own damn set of morals. You're one to talk!



First, it's Jeremy. And Again, you're hypocrisy is showing, lol! I don't believe in a specific religion (call it atheism), so for you to use it as some trump card of hate really shows your pessimism, you're more worse than those Christians you accuse, which is HILARIOUS.

And for you to speak, watch who you proclaim to not be LGBT (I'm bi). You went on a rant about some shit that doesn't even pertain to the stuff at hand. What's worse, when objected peacefully you result to insults. How old are you? Did some evil Christians thump their Bible at you too hard and get some of the leather/paper cover in your eye? Calm down.

The man died, enough already. People are affected one way or the other, stop spouting crap because someone feels indifferent or different than you about the situation. This isn't about the LBGT community either, this is about a man who had done so much positive in his life that for the same reason it's sad that he had to take his own. You need to get off your bandwagon and understand that there are and will always be a lot of people who won't share your view.

Now, cut the noise.


Who really knows what drove him to do this?
It's a shame, for sure that such an active, accomplished and good-looking kid like Joseph ended his own life...The world lost a good soul.


As someone who has suffered suicidal thoughts for most of my life, i know that

1) Suicidal thoughts or actions not fundamentally selfish, but about the inability to handle pain. Humans are not equal in the ability to tolerate emotional or physical pain-- some folks can handle it better than others.

2)Suicidal thoughts or actions are complicated by the fact of being Queer. Many Queer folk suffer different forms of social isolation in the majority "heteronormative" society. This can sometimes make it harder to deal with all kinds of problems in life, from childhood abuse, to sickness, unemployment, poverty or depression, etc. Many Queers still feel socially alienated in a society in which most people see us as "different" rather than the "norm"-- this can make the other struggles in life much harder

There is far too much pain and suffering in our world, and most people are forced to bear it quietly, so as not to come off as weak or whining complainers


Z as a family member of joe we are not blaming him for nething no one knows his reasoning behind his act n as far as calling it a cowardly decision its actually not it actually take alot of strength to take your own life yes we're grieving but no we dont blame him or society cause we dont know why he did it were jus left to celebrate his life

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